Bipolar Reflections

We're so sorry Uncle Albert, but we haven't killed a patient all day

2009-01-31T07:07:00.002-05:00

So Eli Lilly has pleaded guilty and owes a lot of people a lot of money. Their drug Zyprexa, the one that is at the heart of the current legal issues, has caused a lot of people a lot of pain.....

....Does anyone remember when the helping profession actually wanted to help people?....

On top of everything else, I knew at some point Lilly would have to get down on one knee and ask for forgiveness. I just never imagined it would come in this form, "“The company deeply regrets the past actions covered by the plea,” said Phil Johnson, executive director of investor relations, in a call to investors." (http://industry.bnet.com/pharma/1000755/lilly-apologizes-for-wrongful-zyprexa-promotion-still-shovelling-cash-into-settlement-furnace/)

If this doesn't take the cake nothing will. They apologized to their investors.....never mind the people their medication has hurt and even killed....the investors...hold on a minute I need to make certain I didn't just get sucked into some kind of Bizarro world....well more Bizzaro I suppose since this place is quite mad already.

On one hand it's no surprise. The company is as unconscious as can be, so any actions like this will only come from the same source. On the level of my mind I cannot think of anything else to say but WTF.

I don't know what's funnier, the fact that they are apologizing to investors or that my doctors are still trying to prescribe this toxic pill to me.

The one about Shopaholics

2009-01-28T08:09:00.003-05:00

Gianna over at Beyondmeds wrote a post about an article that appeared in the New York Times about shopaholics as people with a possible brain disorder:

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/28/health/28shopping.html?_r=1

Gianna thought that, "It’s a psychological problem. But let’s relegate out of control shopping to a brain disorder too, so people can have one less thing to take responsibility for. This is really getting ridiculous. Pretty soon we won’t be responsible for any of our bad behavior as it all becomes pathologized and out of our hands. And you can be sure they’ll be a drug for it, too. Since their calling it OCD related it’s a good bet they’ll try out SSRIs."

I responded to her at her blog, but wanted to post my response here:

"When we are completely aligned with the insanity of our egoic mind how can we be responsible? I know when I am completely gone my actions are only coming from a very unconscious place. I don’t think the problem is idnetifying compulsive shopping as some kind of dysfunctional brain structure.

It is in the labeling and treatment…..and mostly the treatment. I am certain they will try to push some kind of a drug for this. However, like many other things OCD is being shown to respond best to things like Dialectical behavior therapy (which is really an expansion on the Tao, Zen and other ’spiritual’ teachings about awareness, acceptance, etc.)

I don’t look at this as bullspit (one of the tags for the original post was bullsh#t) at all. These people are suffering in their constant search for fulfillment, but never getting it no matter how much they shop. I agree with you that a lot of this is the system trying to make more money. However, when we start talking about people taking responsibility for “poor impulse control” we start blaming them for their own dysfunction."

I think it is important for us to remember that the collective unconsciousness has reached insane levels. Things like Bipolar disorder are just a heavier level of the same insanity 99% of our society suffers from. If we are ever going to start waking up the only thing we can do is start to become aware of our crazy mind patterns. That is the most important piece of the puzzle.

Thank god for today

2009-01-20T11:54:00.003-05:00

Not much to say today, but I want to give a hearty thanks to the universe for having Obama be the man taking over the reigns of the country today. Besides everything else about him, Obama seems to be more "awake" than any other President we have ever had.

Let's hope this is the beginning of an upswing for our country.

Bipolar and Schizophrenia Research OR Where's the Genetics????

2009-01-18T06:57:00.000-05:00

Take a look at this: http://www.voanews.com/english/2009-01-17-voa7.cfm

Ahem.

"Researchers say they may have found a genetic link between two mental illnesses -- bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. Scientists searching the health records of nine million Swedes found the disorders share common genetic causes. "

If you read the rest of the article (and I would bet the entire research paper) you will notice one very striking tidbit...wait for it....waaaaiiiittt....: there was no actual biological genetic research done.

None.

Nope.

Nada.

The big NO-thing.

Even the title is iffy. Possible links? Really? What about the possible links of our outgoing pres. to some kind of reptilian alien lifeforms? Should I do some research about that?

For this particular study the researches looked at case files in Sweden between 1973 and 2004 and found that "They found that in families with bipolar disorder, there was a 64 percent increased risk of developing schizophrenia."

This proves nothing about their being a genetic link. I could argue that this shows the type of mental conditioning that occurs growing up in a heavy HEAVY situation. If this study went back for several generations and showed the same types of "mental illness" then I would find it more likely to believe genetics had a big say.

I am not saying they don't. What I am saying is this study is, for the most part, bullspit. It tells us nothing we don't already know. So, why waste time with this?

"Lichtenstein adds that finding common causes for the two diseases could help in developing treatments."

Ahhh...follow the money. If schizophrenia and bipolar are linked it makes it much MUCH easier to push things like anti psychotics and upcoming drugs without getting hit with a 1.4 billion dollar loss.

To me this is just another pointer to how important it is for me to be aware and vigilant in my own treatment. Most people in the industry are not looking out for my best interest. They are running a business. It's not because they are evil people, just unconscious people living out their own dysfunctional conditioning.

Unfortunately their conditioning wants to put tons of toxic substances in my body. The doctors don't deal with life issues and the therapists delay doing any serious therapeutic work until said substances start working their magic. It's a mess to say the least.

I hope people are able to look at research like the one mentioned above with an objective eye. It would be nice to see some hard biological evidence on this subject, but I don't think science is capable of ding that yet. I hope I am round when they are able to identify, with some degree of certainty, biological factors that cause these conditions....or not...

Which Drug Company Will be the First to Fall.

2009-01-16T08:46:00.000-05:00

Many people seem to think the pharmaceutical industries are untouchable. They also thought that way about the financial industry. Even when Enron happened many thought that it was just an ugly mole that had been removed from the American skin. It's only now that we see Enron was a sign of a much larger problem. Corruption, incompetence, unethical business practices all helped put this country in the huge financial hole it is in right now.

Pharmaceutical companies are the next to trip on the karmic wheel of time. Many believe karma to be some kind of judgmental entity that has some kind of guideline/punishment system based upon good and bad. Karma is simply the energy you put in is what you get out. If you put in a lot of negative energy, the wheel will spin and you will encounter more negativity. There are many words to express this sort of thing ("what you resist persists" comes to mind), but I like Karma.

The Pharmaceutical companies have pumped all kinds of negativity into their universe. They pimp drugs, hide research that shows negative results, pay off researchers, try to market toxic medicines to children, etc. You CANNOT pump so much junk into your world without it having consequences.

http://www.calpirg.org/blog/blog/for-drug-company-1.4-billion-is-just-the-cost-of-doing-business

A possible 1.4 billion dollar settlement for Eli Lilly? Zyprexa destructive?

GASP! Holy Misleading Meds Batman.

This is just the beginning. As more children and young people develop diabetes from the pills they take the outrage and congressional hearings will grow* Eli Lilly and Dr Joseph Biederman may wind up being the Enron(s) for the Pharmaceutical industry....although dumping toxic waste into kids may rank slightly higher on the destructive meter then Enron.

We have gone astray. The healing professional is no longer interested in healing. For the most part, it has become an ego driven money making machine only interested in the pursuit of more. It is striving without ever arriving. People aren't getting better they are just numbed out until the next event that triggers a major episode. Then the dosages are simply upped or new meds are piled on. Luckily, nature will correct itself and I do believe the healing profession can come back from this.

Even Rome fell.

Some of the Pharma Emperors will as well.

*and that can be a problem. We need to meet this situation with factual responses and not simple anger. I don't care about proving these people wrong. I only care about getting people better and that they stop poisoning children.

So you think that most people aren't bat sheet crazy?

2009-01-10T07:18:00.001-05:00

The world is pretty freakin nuts. Those of us with Bipolar are just suffering at a higher level. Don't believe me? Take a look at this:

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/baltimore_city/bal-dixon0109,0,3147190.story?page=1

"Baltimore Mayor Sheila A. Dixon was charged today with 12 counts of felony theft, perjury, fraud and misconduct in office, becoming the city's first sitting mayor to be criminally indicted.

The case stems in part from at least $15,348 in gifts Dixon allegedly received from her former boyfriend, prominent city developer Ronald H. Lipscomb, while she was City Council president. She also is accused of using as much as $3,400 in gift cards, some donated to her office for distribution to "needy families," to purchase Best Buy electronics and other items for herself and her staff."

Forgetting everything else, focus in on the fact that she took gift cards meant for needy families and went on a shopping spree at Best Buy.

Effing nuts.

Years ago this story would have caused me to feel outraged and royally pissed. Today, while that position still might come up in the head, I recognize that she is just totally gone.

Unconscious.

Living with an insane mind.

This allows me to feel compassion for her. I am not religious, but I consider Jesus to be a great teacher. Every time I read a story like this one here is what immediately comes to me: "Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing."

Look at Gov. Rod Blagojevich, they have him on tape talking about the corrupt things he is doing/wants to do and the guv is not only denying what's on tape, but is claiming to be a champion for the underdog.

There is hope. Eckhart Tolle's webcast on Oprah.com was heard by over a million people each week. Wayne Dyer's reflections on the Tao, Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life, is in the top 1000 sales on Amazon.com. While these aren't at the same numbers as The Dark Knight it is promising that so many people have even a tiny bit of awareness to go hunt these teachings.

I hope the next time you, or I, are sitting there thinking you are abroken person, you remember this is a mad MAD world and you are doing the best you can.

Great Minds Think Alike

2009-01-08T08:19:00.000-05:00

I found this exceptional post about alternative medicine and the Obama presidency: http://thenutrientpath.wordpress.com/2008/11/30/the-first-holistic-president/

Sue makes some exceptional points and did better research then my hard to focus brain did. Her blog is wonderful and I suggest you check it out.

Phil at Furious Seasons pointed out that one of the candidates for Surgeon General, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, claimed anti-depressants don't cause suicidal behavior in children after reports came out of England that they do.

Dr. Gupta seems to be a celebrity type choice for Surgeon General. I would have liked to seen someone a bit more holistic. I hope this isn't a sign that when it comes to mental health it will be business as usual.

Holy $%#^balls Batman!

2009-01-08T06:13:00.000-05:00

http://www.who.int/mental_health/management/depression/definition/en/

Sorry about the title, but it's what came to me when I read the link above.

I was hunting different things on the net this morning (no not porn you pervs) and I discovered this little tidbit above from the World Health Organization. Apparently they predict depression will be the number two disease in the world by the year 2020. It is currently number four on the list....

....which is somewhat ironic that depression should be so motivated to climb the disease ladder....

and the leading cause of disability. The report does not mention if they count Manic Depression is this statistic.

Bipolar is 7th on the list for non-fatal disease. They do recognize the rate of suicide, 5.5 people out of 1000 for those not on treatment in the year 2000, but I suppose since it is not guaranteed the condition will end in death it is considered non-fatal.

This is staggering and I cannot help but ask this spiritual question: What the $&*% is going on in this mad world?

I refuse to accept the fact that this is all the work of genetics. There has been a tremendous shift in the greater unconsciousness/insanity of our world. Our minds simply cannot not handle it anymore. I believe there needs to be a major shift to the way we deal with mental illenss. We must look at the whole picture with a holistic approach. Pdocs need to stop eating at their free buffets from pharma reps and start building relationships with nutritionists who can help clients change their dietary lifestyle.

Funny story: I do not do well with anti-psychotics. My family has a history of diabetes and I am somewhat overweight. When I go on certain weight gaining meds I gain weight. When I told my Pdoc this at the time he simply told me to eat less. I had to use a lot of self-control not to go Three Stoogers on him. If anyone is reading this that doesn't know about these drugs, a lot of times you just can't help yourself or the hunger becomes so great you don't care. Simply eating less is not the most realistic solution with many of these drugs.

This report makes me think our society is having a collective breakdown. It is becomming so hard to deal with the intense everyday insanity that our minds are shutting down. I know I can't even watch the news any longer. I will do a quick scan of sites like MSNBC and that's about all I can take. It really is a shame so many of us have to suffer when thhere must be a better way. I just hope we find it in time.

What will the Obama presidency mean to those with Bipolar, etc.?

2009-01-07T14:26:00.000-05:00

I don't know.

Thank you and good night.

Seriously, I have no idea. I read that the senior members of the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance met with the Obama transition team. That is a good sign.

The big question for me is how influential will the pharmaceutical lobbyists be? Obama has tried to distance himself from things like lobbyists, but being in the big house means you have to play the game to a certain extent. I am not even certain at this point how much influence the new leader can have on the mental health industry.

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RANDOM 'The Amazing Kreskin' IMPERSONATION

I do predict that during the next four years the practices of big pharma will come around to bite them in the keister. Like the banking and automotive industry they wont see it coming, but it's coming. I believe it will mainly come in the form of backlash from how sick kids are getting from the ADHD, Bipolar, etc. medications. The lawsuits will start becoming overwhelming as more kids develop diabetes and other conditions as a direct side-effect of these meds.

I also predict I will win the Powerball, but that may be hopeful thinking more than anything else.

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It is a strange time to be dealing with any kind of mental disorder. It seems like there is a serious lack of skill when it comes to health professionals diagnosing their patients. There is a lot of misdiagnosis going around that is causing a lot of suffering. I really don't know what, if anything, the Obama administration can do, but I hope they are able to bring about some form of positive change.

Why isn't there more information about Neuroplasticity and Bipolar? (a.k.a. the one where I stop using Friend's inspired titles for posts)

2009-01-05T17:10:00.000-05:00

Just a quick note.

Neuroplasticity is the INCREDIBLE science that has proved the brain is not hardwired. Scientists have shown through plasticity that the brain can be rewired and work around damage sections. Neuroplasticity has helped stroke victims recover and done miraculous work with other forms of brain injury.

Bipolar is a brain disorder.*

Neuroplasticity deals with rewiring the brain.

This should be a no-brainer....heh...I just made a funny.

However, for whatever reason Bipolar seems to be off limits when it comes to this sort of thing. I have found barely a mention in any of the recent "neuro" self-help books and Google searches wind up flat (and rather dull if you look at the results). Someone needs to have the courage to start looking into what neuroplasticity can do for conditions like Bipolar disorder.

When you look at the successful cognitive behavior therapy programs done with OCD patients you will notice it is plasticity in action. They are literally reprogramming the brain patterns of these people.

I know that part of the problem is the McDonald's drive-thru approach taken by the mental health system. Most psychiatrists and therapists want to get you in and out the door as quickly as possible (and getting Depakote samples as the Happy Meal toy sucks). There is no real holistic approach that sees treatment as a unified effort. We need more neuroscientists to start looking at Bipolar and plasticity.

**I wrote to Dr. Jill Taylor, author of "My Storke of Insight" asking this very question. I hope she gets back to me with her opinion**

*Supposedly

The one where the spiratual guru/MD battles the Wall Street Journal writer.

2009-01-05T07:01:00.000-05:00

Deepak Chopra, Andrew Weil and Rustum Roy recently posted a response to a Wall Street Journal article about alternative medicine, The Touch that Doesn't Heal by Steve Salerno (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/deepak-chopra/leave-the-sinking-ship-an_b_154538.html). In the original article (found here: http://s.wsj.net/article/SB123024234651134037.html) Salerno, not some kind of spice, but a real person, rips into the field of alternative medicine with such gems as, "Is there anecdotal evidence that unconventional therapies sometimes yield positive outcomes? Yes. There's also anecdotal evidence that athletes who refuse to shave during winning streaks sometimes bring home championships."

Salerno, still not a cooking spice although the potential is there, seems like a fun guy to have at parties. I went to his web site Shamblog and found a Fox News like intensity there. Apparently Mr. Salerno is on a crusade to wipe out all things alternative. His last book, "SHAM: How the Self-Help Movement Made America Helpless.", tells me all I need to know about adding a dash of Salerno to my life.

Anyhoot I digress and I promise no more spice references.

The biggest problem I have with Mr. Salerno's article is he tends to cut alternative medicine no slack. He puts Dr. Chopra and Wiel's work at the same level as hucksters and infomercials. The article does have some merit when it looks at the businesses that are taking advantage of the growing popularity of alternative therapies. However, the gross generalizations take away from the validity of such points.

Dr. Chopra, Dr. Weil and Dr. Roy decided to write a response to this article because they "believe that Salerno's piece is the opening salvo from the right aiming to influence the incoming administration as it strategically allocates resources for improving the U.S. health and wellness system." I do not think this article is a salvo per se as much as the rantings of someone who has some real files with alternative medicine and self-help practices. However, I do agree that the messages of the original article will be the themes big business use to try and discredit all things "alternative."

I find two things funny about this situation:

1) The original article lambastes the companies that are peddling baloney products, but ignores the horrific side effects of big pharma.

2) Chopra, who has done a lot of spiritual writing, seems to respond the original article from an egoic position of I am right and the WSJ is wrong. I really like Deepak, but he is just as susceptible to having his buttons hit as the rest of us. He seems to take some offense to some of the article. I am glad that he is trying to bring awareness to our broken health care system and hope he continues to do so.

The United States health care system is insane. I do not think a system this crazy can support itself much longer without some form of collapse. I don't care how much money big pharma makes, they will reap what they sow. I am glad Mr. Chopra is shining light on the rigid thinking of articles like the one in the WSJ.

The one where I can't sleep.

2009-01-04T05:26:00.000-05:00

I had wanted my first blog post to be something incredible, amazing and really really fantastic. Instead I will have to settle for a little something about sleep.

It's 5:30AM on the East Coast and I have been up for the past two hours. I am not awake because I feel like I don't need sleep or because of any kind of bladder problems. I am awake because I am what the french don't call 'tired, but wired.' My mind is racing at a million miles per hour and I feel like I could jump out of my own skin.

It is not pleasant.

The special thing about sleep disruption is that it can cause a chain reaction of symptoms leading to bad places. I have no idea how this will come back to kick my butt later on, only that I must be vigilant in my self-awareness today. I know that when my sleep is disturbed some other symptom will manifest itself later on. It might be impulsiveness, irritability, etc. It does not matter. What does matter is the ability o know that whatever happens is simply a trigger due to a lack of sleep and not because I am a broken wretch.

Do other people still use that word?

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RANDOM RANTING

If you keep reading my blog, assuming of course that I keep writing it, you will notice that I often refer to the world as quite effing crazy. It is funny that people like myself are labeled with the term "mental illness" when in fact almost everyone can seem mentally ill to someone else.

It is insane that we have a socially acceptable level of crazy and need to label anyone who goes off the reservation and takes it to a new level. Everyday the news gives us hundreds of examples lunacy and most people accept it as normal. With a constant bombardment of death, gossip and economic collapse is it any wonder that so many of us can't cope.

RANT OFF

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I am beginning to teeter out. Maybe I will try to go back to sleep. I was hoping to start my new blog with a little more pizazz. The important thing is that I posted. Every little step is a victory.

And so my fellow Americans, this first post ends not with a bang, but a yawn.